Original Meme Single

Al Dente Felony

Published Mar 25, 2026

#drama##funny##viral##catchy

Background

Influencer Molly-Mae sparks UK-wide outrage after a culinary catastrophe.

Dry pasta meets cold water.

0:000:00

Intro

Verse 1

Pot on the burner, the burner is cold

A culinary sin, or so I’ve been told

She dropped the penne in a lukewarm bath

Now the whole of the UK is feeling the wrath

No bubbles popping, no steam in the air

Just a ceramic nightmare and a vacant stare

Gordon Ramsay’s screaming in a padded cell

While the starch turns to glue in a watery hell.

Chorus

Oh, it’s a pasta crime, doing hard time

Putting the wheat in before the water can climb

Cold water, dry pasta, a nation in shock

She didn’t even wait for the tick of the clock

Starchy and soggy, the texture is wrong

We’re singing the ballad of the Pasta Song.

Bridge

Wait for the boil.

Honor the soil.

Don't let the gluten spoil.

The salt...

she forgot the salt.

Outro

Ma'am, step away from the stove.

You have the right to remain silent.

Anything you cook can and will be used against you in the court of public opinion.

The internet has thoughts

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Be the first to react.

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